Farewell

Farewell! Farewell is difficult. Its difficult for me because its sounds definite. Is it not easier to say goodbye when you know you will see each other again, someday, it doesn't even have to come true. But this vision makes it easier.

Anyway, every time one of my relationship came to an end, I was afraid of the hole I would fall into after the break up. I hated the definite aspect of it. I am not allowed to see this person ever again?
I really know that its over for you but I want to believe there is no end, there might be a path going somewhere else. But its not the end of the path. Believe me, relationship cant have an abrupt end if you loved each other.
I assume for you its better to try and forget as soon as possible. Forget the pain I caused and I understand that.
I also know that the way I ended or let the relationship end was horrible, and could be avoided. I am sorry that you came to Berlin and that you have to go through this now.
I will try and make it easier for you by taking my stuff out of the apartment etc.

Today was sad, but in a way also healing. I cried a lot. I talked a lot with Gaston.
I thought a lot about our "happier" days, when we tried to make plans for the future (we always had some plans, but I think I was often too passive) I have bee missing these days for almost a year now. When everything felt light....even though it was heavy with the sabeth think we had to deal with. But sundays were always the happiest days. Then we were at ease and did only fun stuff.

Anyway. Good bye. My Hansi Hinterseher


Keep writing on whatever you write right now. You are so talented. Do it!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J9LgHNf2Qy0